What's in a kiss.
Personally, I’ve not experienced a terrible kiss, uncomfortable yes, forgetable definitely. But not terrible…though my last kiss over the weekend, I believe is going to make me regret it. He was coughing apparently from some bug, but I kissed him anyway. And then I woke up this morning with a scratchy throat. Fucking caught the bug.. stupid me.
But anyway, I digress.
What's interesting is it isn't clear if kissing was learned or from instinct. I mean if I didn’t watch all those people french kissing on tv or reading about it on those romance novels, would I ever have indulged in it?
I remember being sixteen and wondering when on earth was I going to experience my 1st real kiss. A good proper french kiss. The ones that curled your toes. Like in the romance novels.
Some of my friends at school were already making out with boys but not me… being a late bloomer and all that. One time, I remember being asked by a classmate (I forget who) about whether I’ve kissed a boy. I lied and said yes.. though I hadn’t and desperately wanted to.
Anyway, my time came the following year, when all the major exams were behind me (this was the result of my typical strict asian upbringing.. my life those days basically centered around all the major exams in school). Also I didn’t meet that many boys as I was in an all girls school, but with the exams behind me and an almost urgent need to be kissed, I somehow stumbled upon the opportunity.
I was in Mc Donalds having lunch one day with my girlfrriends and we noticed this bunch of boys a few tables away..so anyway, yadayadayada.. long story short.. I’m suddenly in love with this guy who was 4 years older than me. At 17 that was a lot of years and he was a bad boy of sorts..tall dark and handsome with a big bike.
He kissed me for the 1st time in the cinema. We were seated right at the back and the place was pretty empty.. I remember my heart beating furiously and I was so nervous. Somehow I knew that was the day he was going to kiss me although we’d been to the cinema so many times before and nothing ever happened. Instinct I guess. Or the fact that he was sitting so close almost breathing into the side of my face and he kept looking at me instead of watching the movie. Next thing I know, I turned and his lips were on mine. And it tasted… of cigarettes! And it was very wet. My toes didn’t curl or anything. Then he started kissing my ears and my neck which I liked it better cause I couldn’t smell the foul smelling cigarette odour when he kissed those places..
Didn't love my first kiss but at least I wasn't the only 17 year old who’d never been kissed.